In the year and half I’ve been on hiatus, I’ve often thought about what blogging means to me. I’ve always found it a struggle to strike a balance between what I think is an appropriate tone for something as public as The Leafy Cauldron and who and how I really am – and most of all how I feel about food. The truth is, blogging gets on my nerves. Food trends and fad diets are disheartening, I think most vegan food is trash with no signs of improvement, marketing and playing the game to get online attention make me sick to my stomach. And not that I really know what I’m doing (seriously I have no technical understanding of photography and had basically intuited all aspects of the manual setting on my old Canon Rebel) but au courant food photography is overexposed and almost all looks the same. I have often slipped between using I and we, as way of diverting attention from myself. Mostly I’m stumbling on words to say I’ve found it difficult to feel like myself because I feel like I’m writing for a hypothetical audience rather than for myself and I didn’t want to appear to be throwing any shade in anyone’s direction with my constant frustration.
The Leafy Cauldron has brought me into contact with some tremendous people; my dear friend Siobhan from back when I slugging along on Tumblr and we were strictly a Harry Potter food blog and Janet from The Taste Space who reached out when Devon and I had just moved to Toronto. I am so grateful for the real human connections food makes us all every day. Yet, I slowed down and eventually stopped writing. I would never stop cooking – it is integral to my existence as a human being. Food is everything for me. It’s how I relieve stress, express my love and my creativity. In fact, after I stopped blogging I have honed my skills even further in the kitchen. I am more adept than I’ve ever been and that’s saying a lot for someone who has been endlessly cooking with love since they were eleven. I love food and I love sharing it with my whole heart so I want to do better.
A lot has changed since my last post, both personally and in the world around me. On a personal level, we (briefly) went through fertility treatments which (incredibly on the first shot) led to my son, Ambrose, being born in October of 2017. He is amazing. Parenting is incredible. I am filled with light and love. I am so excited to see who he grows up to be. I take my job seriously and I will do everything in my power to have him grow up to be a luminary human being who is empathetic, generous and careful. I know I don’t possess much power in this world (and it’s so, so, so hard not to be pessimistic) but I can preserve this bit of our lives and hope that it brings some joy to others. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve felt like less of a revolutionary (socio-anarchism anyone?) and have shifted my focus to bringing about positive change to my community. It works for me and helps keep my chin up in what feels like a world that is slightly out of control.
So, with my new camera in tow, I’m revving the engine and getting this thing going again! I thought perhaps I’d share a little of the fun baby food I’ve made for Ambrose, maybe a bit about the local farmer’s market I keep unsuccessfully trying to contribute positively to, and definitely some recipes!